If I Ran NASA
Master† Kerner Von Buzzenship
If I ran NASA, it would beÖ
AASA, Animal Astronaut Space Agency
Only pets would command space ships.
Never would humans† make rocket trips.
A dog, monkey, and chimpanzee
Were† first in space to be.
But now† only women and men
To Earth orbit we send.
So† Iíve decided who will go.
Iíll pick my† dog named Mo!
Heíll need a† canine† suit
With four, not two, space paw boots.
Next, Iíd build him a rocket-ship
With a padded cage and water to sip.†
Heíd† eat† tasty astro-biscuits
Made† from steak and candy tidbits.
Heíll† let out a bark at lift-off.
My doggy-naut Mo is† a-loft.
With the right kind of† animal stuff
†Moís,† on board, thatís quite enough.
But what about my cat Minnie?
Would NASA† find her too skinny?
With her on board with my doggy Mo.
Into the heavens, their rocket will go.†
Some think dogs and cats might fight
But not on this spaceship flight.†
Astronauts and cosmonauts got along.
Canines and felines can do no wrong.
Minnie is always† graceful.
I know† Mo wonít† act hateful.
Besides, a trip to Mars takes months.
Minnie will keep Mo out of the dumps.
What if they find a green alien
On a satellite named Tailien?
They will never mind
If he isnít their kind.
Red, White, Green or Blue.
Petsí† colors are different too.
Why not make him a friend?
His green† color will blend with them.
The three will become a team
Holding each in high esteem.
Whose to say which is best?
Getting there and back is their quest.
But on the planet Mars
No longer can Mo† chase cars.
A Marsí rover Iíll build him
With† seats† for the three of them.
Theyíll be driving around
With Mo as their chauffeuring† hound.
On Mars, there is no town
Anywhere to be found.
So Iíll have them build a house
Where Minnie can chase a mouse.
Now Mars Mice are a different sort
The result of a rocket abort.
Two eyes are in their head.
With skin that is bright red.
And weird† unearthly features
Make them very odd creatures.
With an ugly purple† nose
As long as a garden hose.
They root around the floor
And slither out the door.
But theyíll be right at home
In a planetary dome
Built by Alien, Minnie, and Mo
For their former rodent foe.
So when itís time to go
Back to the Earth we know.
There will be four on board
Not one will be ignored.
Though itís† millions of miles
The four will all have smiles
No challenge will be too great
Or unknown scary fate.
The AASA now has two more
Making the animal astronauts four.
Mo, Minnie, Alien and Mouse.
Soon theyíll be home in my house.
But what about their room,
Iíll choose the closet for the broom.
The space will have to† change,
For four astronauts so strange.
Mo and Minnie by the door.
Mouse and Alien on the floor.
Till they sleep on the shelf
And Iíll join them by myself.
* * * * *
Weíll be a happy five
Just glad to be alive
Waiting in that place
For another trip to space.
Kernerís NASA† has wonderful things.
Pets as† celestial queens and kings.
Animal Astronauts launching for the stars
And Buzzenship began it all on Mars.†